By Dan Kinem
Sometimes we hit the jackpot here at VHShitfest and this is one of those times. I was incredibly nervous picking this after just watching a slasher movie (The Carpenter) and it sucking major ass, but I went with the gut-feeling I had that this would be good. All I’ll say is my gut deserves some Coca-Cola and some General Tso’s chicken after this pick. It’s hands down one of the most underrated slasher films I’ve ever seen. Interestingly enough it’s the last film by Ken Hughes, better known for directing Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and the original Casino Royale.
The film opens with a lady on a carousel hanging out after NIGHT SCHOOL. Up comes our killer: an all-black motorcycle rider with a huge helmet covering the face. The killer begins spinning the carousel around and around until it’s flying as fast as possible. I don’t understand how the lady didn’t just go flying off considering it takes so much strength to hold onto those at full speed; the scar I’ve had since I was a kid will tell you that*. He whips out a cool-looking knife and holds it outward until the girl’s head spins right into it and she’s decapitated. That seems very plausible considering all he was holding was a knife in his bare hands and you know how easy it is to decapitate someone’s head with a simple knife in one cut…
You’re introduced to two detectives investigating the murder you just saw, including one with huge Scorsese eyebrows. They find the girl’s head in a bucket of water a few feet away. We find out that’s actually the second student who died (both were decapitated and their head’s placed in water), so logically you suspect the teacher is the one doing the murders.
You meet who you assume will be the next victim, a young Rachel Ward in her first film. She goes into a diner where she is waited on by some ugly man-hating Bette Midler hag who says shudder-inducing lines like, “College girls, all they ever talk about is sex. I mean I ain’t got no degree but I could give a lecture on that subject.” Luckily that bitch gets what’s coming to her later on.
When Rachel Ward leaves she is being chased and followed inexplicably by some unknown person. She gets to her house, locks the door, and calms down. She starts stripping to take a shower and immediately I thought they might go the whole see-through-bra-only route and not show the huge goods, thankfully I was wrong. A slasher movie without gratuitous nudity is like Homer Simpson without a white shirt: criminally insane. She’s showering and washing her body as we hear someone trying to break into the house. She, for some reason, doesn’t pay too much attention to that and continues. We see a silhouette approaching through the shower curtain, but of course it’s a false alarm. It’s the teacher, who gets in the shower with her in what’s easily the most bizarre scene in the flick. He begins rubbing what looks like blood all over her body in a steamy make-out session. Nothing’s ever explained. I’m guessing it must have been some sort of soap but it’s still very strange nonetheless.
The second we, at VHShitfest, see even a single boob we turn into perverts expecting each girl to be naked from that point on. Sadly that’s not the case, but some decent death scenes more than make up for that. Another student is slashed and killed in a pretty amusing attack. All the biker does is throw a net on her, which renders her completely helpless and motionless as she keeps muttering “go away.” Some pretty fantastic editing in this scene makes it really effective. You don’t see the decapitation but immediately you see the head floating to the bottom of an aquarium as an old lady shrieks in terror.
“Old head in the fish tank routine,” says Lt. Eyebrows. The detectives are actually pretty hilarious in the movie. Eyebrows even makes a joke about how the killer must be a fisherman and he must’ve thought she was some mermaid or something absurd like that. By this point you’ve found out all sorts of incriminating evidence against the teacher. He was having secret affairs with each one of these girls, he’s into the ancient African ritual of head-hunting, and he says that he isn’t surprised these girls are getting murdered.
Of course Rachel Ward ends up revealing she’s pregnant with the teacher’s baby and she’s not going to have an abortion. “Why didn’t you tell me?” “I didn’t know how you’d react.” “I should have known, that’s why you’ve been acting crazy lately.” Haha, what an asshole. I love it.
Then you get the much-desired murder of the waitress I mentioned earlier. He slices and dices her up good. Finally cutting her head off in a great slow motion scene. We then find out the head of the girl’s school is having a lesbian affair with one of the students, as well! What kind of fucked-up school is this? Surprised they didn’t attempt to make the head look even somewhat attractive. She’s an old nasty hag and deserves her eventual death. Both of them do.
I won’t reveal the twist at the end of the movie or anything leading up to it; that really has to be seen. I will say the ending might seem like it’s dragging, but give it time. It was one of those movies that has a few different points where it could end. I’m so happy it didn’t, however, because the very last scene is stunning. It’s a classic ending to a really solid and underrated slasher. I couldn’t be happier after watching it and really recommend it.
Also known as Terror Eyes in the UK this was on the Video Nasties list, for some reason. It doesn’t even feature that much gore. In the US the movie was put out by Key Video in 1985 and is still pretty rare. Another VHS was released in the 90s by Warner Bros. and even that one is rare. This has never been released on DVD and I have no idea why. It’s seriously a really solid movie. There’s no doubt in my mind that it would sell well. Any slasher fan with half a brain would buy it as it belongs on their shelf next to stuff like Prom Night and My Bloody Valentine. We found the Key Video version for less than two dollars at a great video store in really good condition. I’m really happy we did. If you ever come across it make sure to pick it up. It’s worth owning a copy, even if you have to pay $10 for a VHS copy. I’m seriously considering picking up a poster. That’s one of the best posters I’ve ever seen.
*I have no scar, that was all a lie.